Sunday, December 25, 2011

Should Have.

Should have been a painter,

Showed you the view,

Something beautiful,

I wish everyone knew,

Should have been a painter,

And used my hope,

Tied it to a canvas,

With some two-ply rope,

Should have been a painter,

And hung them all,

Should've had a dreamscape,

On every wall,

Should have been a painter,

But I never could be,

And words can't express,

What I really see

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Live.

There's not a lot for a poet to give,

Just some thoughts on how to live,

Living in your head is all good fun,

But heads in the clouds don't get things done,

Enjoy the beauty of here and now,

You can see miracles if you just know how,

There's a whole wide world,

Some good some bad,

Avoid the shallow,

Embrace the mad,

When did individuality,

Turn to eccentricity,

We only step from the line,

To get publicity,

Enjoy your life,

Be yourself,

Put all of those inhibitions,

Up on the shelf

Monday, September 19, 2011

Ignorance = Bliss

Glorious sunlight,
Glorious youth,
No need to fight,
With nail and tooth,
My cell phone is charged,
My computer is new,
Why don't those Ethiopians,
Just get one too?
Slavery stitched,
Into my clothes,
Why should I care?
That's just how it goes,
Got better things to do,
Than vote or protest,
Catch up on Jersey Shore,
And buy Snooki's new vest,
Surely we are blessed,
Those of us here,
In a state of ignorance,
With nothing to fear.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Night.

There is but one time for me,

and that time is night,

Nothing better to see,

Than the star's bright light,

Chills on my spine,

From winds unseen,

Blink of a firefly,

Like a flash of citrine,

The cool dark grass,

Collecting it's dew,

Have to lay down,

Run my fingers through,

Look up to the sky,

Wonder what it means,

To be alive,

To have these dreams,

Feel relaxed,

Like I haven't in years,

Stare at the stars,

At all of God's tears.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Things.

There's a lot of things I want to see,

There's a lot of things I want to do,

There's a lot of things I want to be,

There's a lot of things I wish I knew,

There's a lot of things,

In this big wide world,

Mysteries ready,

To be unfurled,

Make a life,

Filled with these things,

Make it an experience,

The whole world sings,

Appreciate those moments,

The big and the small,

There's a lot of things,

But I want them all.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Imperfect.

The mad philosopher.

The preacher.

The wise man.

The fool.

I am all of these things, full of my own contradictions. My own strengths, my own weaknesses; but these things are my own. Thus, these things are me. While none of it is special, these layers are what defines us. The mixture, the primordial ooze of emotion, experience, and character. This is the soul. Sometimes filled with a bright light, only to be thrown back into darkness again. The layers and how you pull them together in your own way is what is unique. A point of view like no other. No, not a brilliant single snowflake, set apart from the rest, but a mutation of the same core. This beginning, this base, is surely the reason why we feel so connected.

We shape each other, and have a need inside to add a layer of ourselves to other people. To shape them into a fitting piece of the puzzle that is our lives. We may not get along, you might loathe and reject my layer, but had your layers formed differently in life we could have been the best of friends. The same is true for friends, had they been formed in a different condition we could have been the worst of enemies. So you may hate me, misunderstand me, hurt me, but I will always try to see what is inside. I will not judge your imperfections. I will love you at your core, for the core of us all is the same. Even if I shout hurtful words, throw fists, or shut you out, (as I am not perfect either) I will try my best to understand you. To marvel at the intricacies of the human condition. I invite you to do the same.

We might perceive each other as ugly, cruel, greedy, terrible, imperfect; but can you imagine a world without imperfection? Of a sameness that bound us all together in a perfectly formed puzzle? No debates, no pain, no conflict.. Without these things the good in life loses its meaning, its value.

I have dwelt on it, and it seems so terribly dull.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Good.

Life can be disappointing,
But only if you care,
Have no time for the drama queens,
The expectations that they share,
You have to find the good in things,
We all have our scars,
Hatred is a cage for love,
You just have to break the bars,
I don't think I am better than you,
Even if you think you are,
I'll try my best to wear your shoes,
But may not walk as far.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Every time I talk about politics I develop tourettes.

Everybody is politically correct, money grubbing whores these days and I find myself weary of it. Everyone in charge are just going through the motions and we all know it. As for us stuck on the bottom, we enjoy our time off as much as we can with a little weed and booze to distract ourselves from the bullshit that is quickly rising to our necks. Some take it a bit too far and acquire habits such as heroin and meth. (Which are running rampant even in the small town I grew up in)

Why do all of these drones in our government and upper class wonder why we are all so fucked up all the time? It's because we can't stand the shit they make us wade through. Unbeknownst to them, their shit really does stink. I tried to write a senator recently about the budget. It was a long and eloquently worded letter, without any cuss words. (even though I wanted to use a few) Also polite and respectful. But what did I get?

Guess what I got...

A reply back! From a fucking desk jockey! It was filled with polite politically correct jargon but this about sums it up:

"Dear Fuckhead,

I didn't even read your letter because you're a fuckhead. I don't care about what anyone in my state says because I'm busy sucking off big business. Have a nice day.

P.S. Go fuck yourself."

Today's world is great isn't it? Everybody knows that they can't make any difference so we just all stare and wave at them with glazed eyes as they keep shitting on us. Waiting to drown.

Oh wait, that's not great. It's fucking terrible.

We're slaves with blue collars and bottles of meds. (for those who can afford them)

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Step right up!

Although the world is a disgusting, terrible place, you have to try to find the little bits of good in everybody. If you consider the thousands of random events that led to them being what they are, you cannot judge them for their trespasses. Some are deviant and beyond hope, such as violent killers and rapists, but not all. The crack head you ignored on the subway could have been you if you had lived their life. There is no way of knowing if you could have taken the same hardships any better. So why treat yourself as some superior being? You do not have to feel sorry for them, but to forget that they were born as an ordinary person is denying their humanity and treating them as a different species all together. Beneath the crack pipe and 7 layers of stolen clothing is a person, believe it or not. Had they been in your shoes, maybe they wouldn’t have ended up this way. But alas, the only way they have ever managed to walk in your shoes is by stealing them.

There’s a strange sadness around the streets. The hobo sleeping in his own whiskey vomit, the prostitute covered in bruises, the crack head stealing a radio, you have to wonder; is this what the future is really like? What has the world done to these people? No hope, given up on pride a long time ago. They don’t flinch as others treat them like animals, because they’ve grown accustomed. Nothing but apes begging for bananas from their cages, taught to perform for their rewards. Even if a call-girl has a black eye she’ll smile for a customer. No matter how much she wants to cry. That’s dedication.

So next time you look at one of these people, don’t think of them as a pest, but a talented performer. They were born and raised to live the low life, getting dragged through by the dick. Every bum you don’t make eye contact with, every poor girl you pick up for a wild night, these moments pass us by. But after we leave they keep on living, desperate and alone, as the rest of humanity’s personal freak show.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Everybody's working for the weekend.

Working a low paying job is kind of like living in a crack house. Some people have been around for years while others are just passing through. Whatever their reason, we are stuck together 8 hours a night, 5 days a week.

The people at my job vary tremendously. Old and young, angry and kind, but forever joined by the middle class. Some are zombies for sure. Completely loathsome of where they are in life. Cursing the god and the crack that have put them there. But amongst the people that have been there for 30 years are those who live in complete ignorant bliss of a world that has forgotten them. They've accepted that sometimes this is all life has to offer. Which is a sad comment, but a truthful one. They carry on their small worlds with the people they've known their whole lives and are truly happy for it. Beauty doesn't always come wrapped in success.

A few of these zen-like folks have served hard time. Prison must alert people to how good a normal life is. We're all so caught up in our dreams we forget that simple people make the world go round. During my time at boot-camp I learned to appreciate the true value of simple things. A chair to sit in instead of a concrete floor. A long hot shower. (and the best part.. ALONE!) These little things that everyone takes for granted. Take the time to go without. So you can really appreciate what you have. You don't have to spend time in the slammer or join the military, just live a spartan lifestyle. Or just cut yourself off from one thing that you use everyday. Hell, try shitting in the woods. It sucks.

The people who understand appreciating simple things the most are those close to death. To be dying is the ultimate form of freedom. Terminally ill have the freedom to say what they wouldn't normally say. Do things they would never have done before. What's the difference when you could die tomorrow? This is the best reason I can find for nobody to ever kill themselves. After my own run in with a dull razor and a sad attempt at offing myself I realized something. I'm wasting my golden ticket! I can face life with absolutely no inhibitions. I could walk down the street butt ass naked if I want to. You can only hope to stop me before I'm dead. I don't care what your reason is, you're down, life has been going shitty, love life is in shambles, or you're just bored with it. You should always embrace the fact you can at least burn out in the best of ways. Without the fear of death the world is an adventure.

Climb a mountain. Tell people who make your everyday life hell to go fuck themselves.

Do whatever, whenever you want.

Because it's better than doing nothing.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Stuck.

Well I've been neglecting my poor blog again. And I really must find the time for a real post. This new job is really cutting down on my sitting on my ass time.

So, as per usual, I'll give you some shitty poetry to tide you over. This pretty much explains my mind right now.

I often ponder,

Why my mind seems to wander,

Instead of doing it's job,

Like an attic full of shit,

And I can't get out of it,

No matter how hard I turn the knob,

So I'll sit on the floor,

And ignore the stuck door,

No real need to fret,

Then I'll look through these piles,

Full of memories and smiles,

And others I'd rather forget.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

I have my hate balled up next to my half-empty cup.

Drama.

Or as a more flamboyant person would put it..

Draaaammaaaaaa!!!

We seem to be moving towards a society of downers hooked on drama. Everybody is on edge.

Strange that you take downers to relieve the stress from all the downers in our day to day lives.

Now let's point some fingers! Who's to blame for all of this bullshit? I'll tell you who, everyone. Seems people need to feed into fitting in nowadays to not be trampled on by the fake whores of life. Some may have their own tastes but choose to keep it hidden in case of, "omg wat if she hurrs this and thinks I'm super lame?".

This is why I do not only blame the fake whores, as disgusting and loathsome as they may be, because it's the general populous who even cares what they are saying. I can't walk through a local mall and not instantly despise everything I'm hearing. These younger ones I see loitering around Hot Topic will usher us into the new world order of giving a shit what brands and bands you like. Go ride a fucking bike or something, and not just to say, "I'm pretty good at bmx on my Whateverbrandisinrightnow." Nobody does anything for fun anymore, it's for recognition. I also blame the same pussy parents I have mentioned before. These kids will do just about anything to not be teased by some skank that half the school has banged so their parents give them all of this new shit to keep up with the times. Even the youngest children are being paraded around in name brand clothes because "Well I don't want the other parents to think we are scum bags." Kids get picked on. Teaching them to shield themselves by stripping away their individuality is why we have this problem. They aren't being taught to shrug off life's downers and drama queens.

Since WHEN did it come to needing an Iphone and a fucking North Face to be considered "less than scum"?

HOW the fuck did you people let this trend of atrocities on our fellow man happen?

Now that I've finished ranting on the aesthetics, let's move on to the meat of the subject. A drama queen as you may know, is one who delights in conflict. My main concern however is not the existence of said drama queens, but with the rising population of them. I mean I see how getting put down by this high school hierarchy bullshit can be stressful, but what happened to friendship? A good friend is someone you can punch the night before and patch shit up with the next day, without all of your personal information and secrets you've shared being aired to everyone in the mean-time out of spite. With the rise of technology it seems the true friend thing is going out of style. Being connected with everyone all the time makes it harder to treasure your friends. These drama queens will go by picking up person after person only to keep some weird love-hate relationship with them until they get bored and throw them away like a used tissue. Seems everyone is quick to throw a punch or a shitty comment someone else's way even if the matter is trivial because people are expendable. Airing all of your little squabbles over your social networking sites so more people can join into your stupid, pointless arguments. Speaking of which, why do these people add each other if they hate each others guts so much? Obviously, just to fight. They need that attention that completely destroying some poor assholes image would bring them. They need to feel powerful, because they are weak minded.

So stop giving a shit what assholes you know said about you, or "getting respect".

Respect is a lost art to us. Trying to earn it from every douchebag you trip over will only erase who you are.

These people will keep an eye on every little detail about you, just to tear you apart.

So be you, fuck the naysayers. You get a lot more out of life when you aren't worried about being perfect all the time.

Monday, January 3, 2011

You are not a snowflake.

Each person thinks they have a special purpose.

A natural drive for their ambition.

What separates the successful from the normal are their opportunities given to them by others and their will.

A strong, carefree, will allows you to be happy during the transitional periods of your life, but a strong will coupled with high expectations for yourself can be crushing. You must always strive for your dreams, but do so with the concept that you may fail. Not everyone is given the best odds. All you can do is hold in there and hope your opportunity arises. What these people judging themselves must realize is that there is nothing wrong with being normal. You can push, and strain for a goal and never have it come to realization. Maybe not because you don't possess the skill, but because you have never thought of the fact that we don't all get lucky and the world runs on average Joes. Pounding out paychecks for just enough to live and get by with an average life. One must never, ever, give up on what they think they are meant for, but to focus on only that is naive and self-appreciating. Sure you feel like this is your time, your place of purpose, but so does everyone else. Don't go putting yourself down every time you fail. Failure is to be shrugged off, not mourned over. Being angry with yourself only makes you not want to try anymore. Or it makes you try so hard you lose focus on the rest of life.

If you feel disgusted with yourself, or ashamed, then you need to throw away your pride. What makes you better than anyone else stuck in the same place as you? Sure you may be smarter, maybe better looking, more physically in shape, but on life's playing field luck is the usual decider of the game. The luck of the draw at that, because most are born into their social and financial settings.

And for those who absolutely have the means to do great things but would be happier being average, be average. Stop living up to everyone else's expectations, or even your own. Live up to the expectation that you will be happy. You don't have to be successful to live happily. You just have to be alive and doing what you want to do. Or at least pursuing it. Doing what you hate will just make you stop caring about life at all.

Take your little moments out of life and hold them tight. Because you really aren't all that special.

There's a couple million more of you, thinking the same thing.